What’s That Superior Power? Why Is There Magic?

Few days ago during my night wind down time, I was scrolling on Youtube and I came across this short:
https://youtube.com/shorts/aq-1PBKOFOM

And while it’s not related to any of the thoughts that it triggered after it….but I couldn’t help myself from pondering on the idea of “Religion”

If you follow me on the gram (before I lashed out on the stalkers and made it private hahaha) well..you’d see that for the first time in my life I just bought a prayer mat, prayer dress and a Quran.

I was actually so ashamed to admit that I don’t remember how to pray or do wudu’ (the washing process pre prayer) that I went in private and asked my aunty who’s the most religious one in the fam to help me, to send me videos or something of how it should be done, and to keep it between us, as I don’t want to be shamed by others….not becuase I care, but because they don’t matter.

99% of those around me preach about religion and yet they don’t even know a damn thing! I also don’t know a damn thing and thats why I was always quiet about it….how can I lecture and preach on something that I have no clue about.

But lately I can’t help but stop myself from thinking about it…my own religion “Islam” the one that I was born into…the one that I keep on hearing a voice on the inside of me that says “It’s not random that you’re born into this religion…so go find out why”

Because everything about me, and I don’t mean just looks and tattoos and stuff..no no, everything in my character, ideologies…etc. it doesn’t give me the idea that I fit in Islam as a religion.

But the truth is…you don’t need to fit anywhere…you can literally come and go to this world without fitting into anything, no tribe, no community, no Ummah (the people of Mohamed) no nothing! this is all just noise and also I think people like the idea of religion because it makes them feel like they are part of something, and I personally think (but this may change after I actually learn) that all religions are of a political motive to control the people.

Not necessarily control in a bad way, no more like to organize us, to make our lives better by implementing rules and regulations that we all follow so the socities can thrive, instead of each one of us making up their own rules and it becomes a jungle.

So Religion in its self for me I don’t really yet know how it’s linked to spiritual connection, I feel its two separate things.

One is a set of rules and regulations that are made to enforce law and order in society so we can live together.

The second one, cannot be explained in words, and it’s so unique and so personal that we will not all agree on what is it…just like “Love”.

And I’ve always been a veryyy veryyy curious kid and still am! so last year I saw a friend on instagram posting about the “Alpha” program for the church people or people who want to know more about Christianity and I just signed up and went! every sunday for two months and it was soo good! they were soo welcoming! I had so much fun and I learned alot, I learned about other perspectives too, which not necessarily I’d agree or disagree, but there were many positives that I can take and adopt in my daily living.

To be fair all the core good things in Christianity, are the same core good things in Islam…its just under different labels, so for me the core stuff weren’t new, it’s just the stories are different.

And i’ve been to endless Hindu temples, buddhist temples, Osho Ashram (the latest one last month)…..and in all of them, no matter where I went….I kept on finding the same truth.

Not only in relgious places, but also I’m so curious that I like to mess with things that are paranormal, things that are foreign, things that the normal human mind cannot put explanations to.

In June, I crossed paths with a woman in her 60’s who she claims she can break curses, rituals, black magic…etc. And previously in my life I’ve tried many of the western and eastern hocus pocus stuff (psychics, reiki, palm reading, tarot, coffee reading, energy healing…endless)

But I’ve never ever had the interest to go to an Arab….who claims they can check and remove (black magic).

So I was curious, something I haven’t tried and my life was lacking any sort of excitement that year, so I was might as well I have that online call with this woman as the person who recommended her to me hyped her up in an insane way.

I join the call, that woman is Lebanese but she lives in Germany, so for me its was morning, for her it was even earlier. So she was like any Arab Levant woman her age, in her house gown, with her cigaret, and morning Coffee. and probably if she wasn’t on the phone to me, she would have Fairuz playing in the backgound, Like i do….like all of us levant people do in our mornings (it’s a global ritual that we all adopted and loved).

So I wasn’t taking her seriously even before joining the call and I stopped taking her seriously even more when she joined and I saw that she looked like any aunty my mom’s age.

But I was already on the call and I do such things for fun, for curiosity, for the story….so might as well I hear what she have got to say.

She started talking and she asked me tell me about you, and here I always challenge those psychics, I don’t shy away…I say..I’m here for you to tell me what you’ve got, so you can start and I can pitch in if needed.

I don’t give them anything in advance because why would I? if they are as good as they claim then I don’t need to say anything.

I will not tell you what went in the session…but when that woman started talking…my jaw dropped.

That old traditional levant aunty…she read me like a book! no no not only! she told me my deepest darkest secrets that I haven’t even uttered them out to any human!

WHAT THE HELL!!!!

and that was the first part of the session, the second part she checks if there’s actually any black magic done, there were two and she described exactly when and what those who done it look like and when she did I brushed it off as (no that doesn’t make sense I don’t know anyone that fits this description) only for me to reflect on it after I hung up….and oh my god! I knew exactly who are the two behind it.

Rest is private so I won’t go into it. However that lady who clearly deals with something whether under or above…I don’t know which team she plays with, but she clearly deals with something…not human.

And while we are conversing, the topic of “God” opened and I don’t remember why I said “yeah..I belive in god but not in religion” and then she snapped and said there’s no god! but I’ve spent my entire life seeking and educating myself so its not my job to educate you.

Ouch! okay aunty I didn’t ask you to…I didn’t tell you educate me, I just stated what I personally believe in…thats it.

However….as she progressed to talk, things weren’t aligining with her statement (there’s no god) because she kept on saying words that have “Allah” and even in her fixes she asked me to burn sandal wood and to say while i’m doing it a specific sentence, and that sentence when I looked it up…it’s a verse in Quran.

Huh?!

If there’s no god, and religions are fake made by humans…..why are you using verses from that book that is written by humans…in your work/healing?

I didn’t question anything…I didn’t bother ask…it doesn’t matter, it was just an observation.

3 years ago I attended a course for Dr.Nader Butto online, go look him up, very interesting man who ventured into the spiritual realm and started bridging his knowledge in medicine with spirtitual practices and he invented a method called “Energy Washout”, here’s the research if you want to read it:
https://scivisionpub.com/pdfs/energy-wahout-a-new-method-to-achieve-wellbeing-and-health-1331.pdf

And if you progress through his 7/8 levels course (i’ve only done 1) then you’ll be qualified to be a practicioner, and to be able to do energy washout for others.

During the call, I loved his brain….what he was saying made sense, so I was very curious to try this creation! but there weren’t any arabs doing it, those I found were in europe (hard for me to go) and he is a palestinian/israeli who lives in Israel (off the table), so i couldn’t find a way to do it.

A year after…by chance my sister gets introduced to this woman who is Iraqi but Swiss citizen and she is based in switzerland but she comes to abu dhabi for work and she met my sister through a friend in Dubai.

And she do many things within the healing, spirituality…etc realm. and my sister did with her things, from that list…but when my sister was telling me, explaining to me what she does…she explained exactly what “Energy washout” is….and I started jumping in my place!!! WHAT!!! link me to her ASAP! as she was visiting dubai only for 5 days.

I reached out and said….I just want to try this. I didn’t explain that I’ve heared about it from Dr.Nader, as I said I limit anything I say with those “healers” as I llike to see what they got, without me influencing anything.

And I went and tried that energy washout…I’ll spare you the details but I have never cried like that in my life…I cried for almost 1 and a half hours, not tears streaming,….no proper shouting! as she pressed on those energy points on my body that they were holding in so much trauma, trapped emotions, sadness, depression, anger….all the negative feelings were released.

And after few days….for the first time in my adult life….I felt so lite on the inside….the heaviness that became part of my normal state….I don’t feel it! I didn’t know was carrying that much weight, Until I got rid of it.

And what’s facinating….Dr.Nader he studied in Italy and probably is Italian, and 99% of his students all of the years from the west…and you know whats facinating, during the energy washout he plays “Quran” a specific chapter, he keeps on playing on repeat.

This healer did the same thing, she told me I’ll be putting this on the speaker, don’t mind it…I need it in the practice, it helps.

I was silent….the “considences” of where I keep on seeing people using the “powers” of quran in all of those random places…doesn’t make sense.

And I’m a conspiracy theorist by heart anyways…I always question…I always ask a hundred and billion times until I reach an answer that satisfies me, that is logical…that makes my brain rest.

So this has triggered years of wonder…why on earth this book that I also think/thought is written by humans….have such powers?

WHY DOES IT HAVE SUCH POWERS????

If it does! and I can clearly see it does! then…that means one thing! this wasn’t written by a human…or if it was a human then that human was surely a vessle…from something far superior.

So the questions in my brain became more pressing and the thing with Quran that yes its written in Arabic, and I speak arabic, but its such complicated arabic that I’d understand the words but I don’t understand the contexts! like you really need interpertation to understand what the context is. so it’s not that easy for me to just go read and understand.

No,no,no,no….

It will be a journey of seeking, alot of efforts must be made, as its like an ocean of knowledge…and I don’t know from where to start.

So I’m starting now this Ramadan, by trying! a social experiment.

What would I feel if I actually pray 5 times a day, at the right timing & if I sit and read quran, slowly to try and understand it.

I don’t know what the outcome would be….but I can’t lie and say I’m not excited! I’m SOOO EXCITED! because I love magic! I love paranormal things! I love things that I feel, intuitions I get…that only I get.

So…I know quite well I won’t be able to answer:
What’s the superior power? and why there’s magic?

I feel that those questions are too massive, and require a life long kind of journey…but for now…I just want to experience and maybe get out of it with (1 small question answered or maybe a few).

I love the unknown…it scares me, but I always threw myself into it.

And this exactly feel like it! an adventure! venturing into a land that I’ve never stepped foot in, no actually a land that I actually fought against ever stepping a foot in.

But…I’m growing, and growth means:
seeking…accepting…changing.

Peace out!